is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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