i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
