Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
