were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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