i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
