dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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