STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
