note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Randomize
