Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
