If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
The air was thick with penises
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Randomize
