We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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