I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
