I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
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