Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize