I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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