I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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