I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
We had sex on a dog bed..
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
