yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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