I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Is this like a preordered booty call?
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
