just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
