so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
