She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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