What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
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