I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
