Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
