we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Randomize
