What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Randomize
