Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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