I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
