He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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