And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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