Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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