Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
