Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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