She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
