Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Randomize
