I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
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