we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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