Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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