I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
