I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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