If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Randomize
