The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
This is the high leading the old right now
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
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I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
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