How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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