You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Randomize
