Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
