all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
She's just so happy...and so naked.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
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