Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
