"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
And then my night got REAL pukey
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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