week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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