Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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